Tuesday, July 2, 2013

'I don't like you'

Have you ever been disliked by your kids? I'm sure most of the time they do, they just don't voice it out all the time. Mine had, just recently.

So we were at the mall last Saturday and Zoe told us she did a number two only to find out that she didn't. When I was telling her that she should not tell me something that isn't true, she started screaming inside the bathroom for no apparent reason. Obviously, we emerged from the bathroom as enemies and she sought alliance from her daddy who was waiting for us outside. When my husband picked her up to ask her what happened, she suddenly bursted out 'I don't like Mommy'. And so there it was, the phrase that I had been dreading to hear.

I think I was caught off guard at that moment and wasn't able to handle to handle myself properly. I sort of had a little tantrum myself and my husband had to play referee between me and my daughter again. Gosh, it's so hard to be a parent when your child is always the teacher. 

The following day, we had to run some errands and we took Zoe with us. While my husband went to pee, we waited by a cellphone store and Zoe started knocking at the glass displays. I asked her to stand beside me but she refused so I took her hand. She refused again and started tugging her hand out of  my clasp until she started screaming again. So at the middle of the mall, I had a screaming toddler who was letting go of my hand as if I was a kidnapper trying to grab her. I let go of her and she went to face the corner with her arms crossed in front of her chest. I asked her calmly to hold my hand and she said 'NO, I'M MAD.' I said 'Why? Who are you mad at?' and she said 'I'M MAD AT YOU!'. I honestly didn't know if I was more amused or surprised when I saw her with her back facing me and her arms crossed on her chest. I could even see her lips pouted from her reflection. Boy, she was really upset. I backed off, remained where I was and asked 'Why are you mad at me?'. She didnt say anything so I just told her 'Alright, since you're still mad at me, I'll just stand here until you're not mad at me anymore.' Then she caught a glimpse of my reflection from the glass displays in front of her and she tried to hide a smile. Just a few minutes after that, she ran to me and gave me a hug and I knew we were ok. 

I've read a lot of parenting books and they're pretty helpful but it's very difficult to remember all those pointers when you're in a tricky situation flooded with emotions. I guess at the bottom of it all, it narrows down to respecting your child the same way you respect grown ups. 

3 comments:

  1. I had the same too before. I remember one time, she told me that, She don't like me, I uttered the same way.. then after a few minutes, she says sorry for saying such words.and gave me a kiss and hug.

    ReplyDelete
  2. they said no children liked their parents, and i believe that. when i was still young, i dislike them, too. you'll only understand their predicament when you become one. tip: when you ask your kid not to do some things, explain to her why so she would know. start from there... goodluck!

    http://roselsmomdiary.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  3. Geez, I am starting to have this problem with my daughter too.. and she's not even two! Immature as it sounds, minsan pinapatulan ko tantrums nya. Like, if she's mad at me and hits or pinches me, I tell her she's hurt Mommy give her the cold shoulder after. More often than not it works naman, bata pa so ayaw na galit ang Mommy so di din makakatiis at hug din at love sa kin. Mama tells me di ko daw dapat pinapatulan ang bata, but at her age, mas naiintindihan nya yung concrete things like that kesa sa mga pangaral. At least, that's what I think. Either way, pareho din naman kami hindi makatiis at bati na din ulit in a few minutes. ^_^

    ReplyDelete